Saturday, March 14, 2009

Ok, I'm slightly freaked out.

At about 1:30 am the doorbell rings. Cautious, I grab one of the many swords kept about as decoration and cautiously open the front door. It's the police. I carefully put the sword down behind the door and ask how I can help them. They proceed to tell me a bizarre story.

Apparently 'a woman' went to a house down the road from us several times asking for 'help'. The occupant(s) of the house wouldn't let them in but offered to call the Sheriffs Office. When the police would arrive, the woman would be gone (Although we live only 4 miles from Wellington, we are apparently served by the Lorain County Sheriffs Department in Elyria) After the last plea, the occupants followed the woman who was in a silver car and it pulled into our driveway. According to the police, a man fitting my description was in the silver car at some point (they showed the woman my DMV photo).

None of this, of course, makes any sense. We don't know ANY of our neighbors accept Heidi across the street from us, who has taken care of our cats a few times. I try never to pull into peoples driveways. It pisses some people off. I tell the officers that we were out most of the evening, not getting in until about 10:30pm (the last request for help was made at about 9:30).

They ask if they can speak to my wife, and if they can come in. It's freezing out so I say of course. I go to wake up Rossana, who is sound asleep. There was no easy way to do it so I told her the police were here to make sure I hadn't killed her. That got her up.

We assured the officers that everything was fine. Then the phone rings. Who calls at 1:45am? The Sheriffs Department does!

"Are 2 sherifs deputies at your residence?" asks a concerned voice.

"Why yes they are."

"May I speak with them?"

It now dawns on me. Once the officers entered my home, they lost contact with their dispatcher. This sort of thing likely makes the other Sherifs deputies nervous. I quickly hand the phone to the Officers who inform dispatch that they in fact, have not been kidnapped. Disaster averted. The officers seem satisfied that we are not involved in some drunken domestic dispute and wish us a good night.

The officers were courteous and proffesional but the story they told me just makes no sense. If I hadn't been so gobsmacked I would have asked more questions...but I didn't.

Oddly, we have a pretty good alibi for tonight in that I got my first speeding ticket is YEARS at 10:05 way North of here. Should I call the Sherifs Office tomorrow and tell them this? Do I have some kind of crazy neighbor? Are they readying a strike team to burst in, guns blazing?

Rossana, seeing that there were no answers to be had at this time is off for bed. I am slightly jangled.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

The Good News...

I returned to my doctor today to see if a month of clean(er) living (and some drugs) had improved me any. I was pleasantly surprised. First, I apparently lost 7 pounds. Horaaaay! Rossana gave me a dirty look.

"I hate you." she said, smiling.

Then we checked my blood pressure. 117 over 80, or as some people call it - Normal!

The doctor was pleased if somewhat surprised. He told me how some of his patients are on 6 different medications because they won't change their bad habits. He also warned me not to go back to my old ways.

For my part I was very happy to hear some good news about my health. The weight loss was a pleasant extra. So far the medication hasn't given me any big scares. I do sometimes feel a little light headed or dizzy, but nothing serious. I do pee more, but I already drank tons of fluids before so no big change. I also appreciated the comments people left. I also got an email from and old old friend of mine. He was a little more blunt with me. "Get your shit straight and stay with the program or so help me...."

I don't to know what "so help me" means and I don't want to find out. He works for the military-industrial complex and for all I know has satellites trained on me to make sure I don't stray. I can easily imagine getting a call after walking into a Burger King.

"Hello?"

"You better be there to only use the bathroom." the voice on the phone says.

Monday, March 09, 2009

Blogging from a small town - Albino Squirrels

I ran some errands in the "Big City" today. That means Oberlin. And as I crossed the town square I ran across one of Oberlin's more odd inhabitants. A white (or albino) squirrel.



Apparently these little guys are well known. Some people have traveled from foreign lands to see these guys. They are indeed white. It seems that due to feeding by locals a trait that would normally take these little guys out of the gene pool pretty quick has allowed them to thrive. There are still plenty of brown and grey squirrels. But I bet the white guys get hit by cars a lot less. Maybe that shows that they are evolving. Blending in with the environment is not as important as not being hit by cars. Hmmm..

Soooooooo freakin cool - A windmill

Check out this video and then try this for yourself here.